Peach and Lime Daiquiri
by TheOneYouCallWe
Summary: Give me envy, give me malice, give me attention. Conrad stumbles across Yuuri's newest obsession, and drastic measures must be taken. ConradxYuuri.
1. Chapter 1

Peach and Lime Daiquiri

Chapter 1: Take It a Day at a Time

One: Kudos and cookies and a possible dedication to the first one to recognize the title references.

We: Hint- The lead singer did a song with Fall Out Boy.

Warnings: My absolute favorite pairing in KKM—ConradxYuuri. Yum. x)

* * *

"If I may ask, Your Majesty…but what are you reading?"

"Um… a…lime."

"…what is this… 'lime'?"

Blushing heavily, Yuuri explained, "Well, you see…there's this thing called fanfiction…and, um, you can generally mess around with the characters and make them do all sorts of things…"

"What does that have to do with this 'lime'?"

"Um…well, you see, you can _really _make them do anything, like…um…" Yuuri hurriedly mumbled the last part.

"Your Majesty?"

"Youcanmakethemhavesexnstuff."

"I didn't quiet catch tha-"

"I SAID YOU CAN MAKE THEM HAVE SEX!" Embarrassedly, Yuuri quickly clamped his mouth shut and eyed Conrad fearfully.

Also blushing now, Conrad flushed noticeably and mumbling a soft "oh," quickly dashed out of the room.

"Thank the Gate he didn't ask what kind of fanfiction it's about…"

* * *

"Gunter."

"Conrad? You don't come to greet me often. Is Yuuri acting up again? I should have you know--!"

"No, no, nothing like that." Conrad attempted to calm down the obsessive mentor. "What persay…have you told Yuuri about…" he swallowed nervously, "sex in our world?"

* * *

"What the HELL are you staring at?.!" Yuuri screeched for the 4th that day. Ever since Conrad had fled his room, people had suddenly began staring at him and…and..._winking _at him! In that creepy **suggestive **way!

"Er, Your Majesty…" an eerily-smiling Gunter blocked his path from the creepy pervert-peoples. "I need an emergency meeting with you and Lord Weller."

"With Conrad?"

"Yes…"

* * *

"Conrad, make all the people stop staring at me! It's freaking me out!" Yuuri latched onto Conrad's arm, whining like a child.

"But that's precisely why we called you to this meeting…it seems you need to be taught how sex works, and Conrad being your godfather and the most mature of us all, we feel he should…teach you."

"…are you _serious?"_

"Your Majesty-"

"YUURI!"

"Yuuri, what you mentioned about the 'lime' in your quarters, is referred to as a 'peach' in our world…and seeing as you will be wed to Wolfram soon, you must be taught how the concept of sex works."

A noticeable blush spread across their cheeks. "B-but…from you, Conrad?.!"

"The alternative is Gunter…" who seemed almost _too _willing to teach him.

"Never mind, you can…teach me."


	2. Chapter 2

Peach and Lime Daiquiri

Chapter 2: Reality is Unsettling

One: I am pleased with most of this chapter, except…

We: I think the kiss happened too early on, and the tone of thought made such an abrupt change, damnit.

Warnings: Mild ConYuu, hints of past MuraYuu, slight innuendos.

* * *

There was something amiss with this scenario. For one, Günter appeared all to happy to shove the two off to Conrad's bedroom quarters, accompanied by a flower-surrounded and jovial Yozak who was announcing of wedding bells singing again. Poor Yuuri was left quite dumbfounded, as the concept of 'sex ed.' was foreign to him, especially when being pestered into it via very eager mazoku.

…or sex in general was foreign to him.

Günter grinned one last time, then slammed the bedroom door shut and--the bastard!--_locked_ it midway (no entering or leaving for either side).

Conrad drew in a steady breath; it was only his kind and master that he was teaching in one of the most impossibly embarrassing situations. He would survive, though--so long as Yuuri asked no 'could you show me?'s. He may just break then.

"The most basic question is…" He again, breathed sharply; oh his nerves were a jumble!, "do you have any idea what sex is?"

Yuuri blushed 5 shades of red, and then a few hues of purple and magentas Conrad had never even seen in a person, let alone a mazoku. He stammered and stuttered, then stopped to catch his bearings.

"I…yes. And…do I have to explain it any?"

"No, Yuuri; you needn't. As long as you understand the concept, it's quite alright." _Besides, I would hardly be able to control myself. _He sat down on the very edge of the bed--still clothed, mind you--and let his head fall into his cupped hands. This was much more difficult than the he had come to believe.

A worried Yuuri plopped down beside him. He opened his mouth to say something, and closed it--several times. He came to a conclusion (or prologue) of his statement, with, "Did I…do something wrong?"

"No, Heika. You did not." Yuuri winced as Conrad reverted back to the formal 'Heika' and stared at his shoeless feet.

"Yuuri, I apolo--"

"No, no; I know. I just wish you'd remember--we're closer than that. I mean, I wouldn't trust anyone but you to teach me, instruct me, and show me just what…it is." With the word 'show me' something in Conrad mended tremendously, and another bent in impossible ways. Yuuri was so genuine to him, so accepting, that it was no wonder Conrad stupidly, moronically, blissfully broke any master-servant boundaries and kissed his dear King.

With Conrad being the secret deviant he is, he found a way to effectively teach Yuuri the concepts of sex, and still gain his way--quickly. "This is called a kiss, Yuuri," he murmured against those still, pliant lips. "You can just about _any_where," he accentuated the 'any' by licking at the boy's lips, "and still enjoy it."

"Even…?"

"Yes; especially there." Yuuri was not rejecting his actions, although he seemed quite shocked by Conrad's advances. It was such an odd thought, kissing Conrad, and yet so appealing…

"Um…Conrad…I'm kind of confused…"

"For what reason?" Yuuri's neck was so slender; the animal in him was gradually becoming more demanding for a taste of his skin, but Conrad still held the reigns.

"Well, I…do we have to do this?"

"Only if you wish to do."

Yuuri was so awkward and shy, glancing off in many different directions, yet avoiding Conrad's eyes every time. He bit at his lip, creating a bruise. "I…yeah. I mean, it feels better with you, than it ever did feel kissing Murata…" He laughed sheepishly, hoping Conrad wouldn't catch the slip of tongue and go off on a rampage upon the Sage.

Thankfully, Conrad was emotionally calm, at least.

"You wish to do so?"

"Yeah. I want to."

There was no turning back, and he knew it. They knew it. They knew of the possible consequences that could arise from it, and accepted them.


	3. Chapter 3

Peach and Lime Daiquiri

Chapter 3: The Kitchen's On Fire!

One: Alright, since I have officially (or perhaps before even this) been demanded for an update, I will do as…demanded.

We: Plus, we have all this music at our disposal. **_A LOT._**

One & We: -music hunters-

Warnings: ConradxYuuri lime, because hell knows it's a **LIME **and I can't write lemons. :)

* * *

Conrad made a mental note to himself to thank Günter with nude shots of his dearest Heika, as he laid the lightly blushing--the embarrassment of the situation had subsided, and now Yuuri appeared almost _eager--_maou on the soft, plush bed. From what minimal information he had gained in the 5-minute walk it had been to his chambers, Yuuri was very unexperienced--aside from a kiss or two from Murata (the boy was so curious! and Murata was in a maid's outfit!).

Slowly, Conrad began to sick and suck at Yuuri's largely exposed neck, reveling in the small whimpers emitting from the boy below him. It was a miracle, it was, or perhaps just a figment of their imaginations.

"Conrad…" Yuuri bit at his lip; he and Murata had never advanced farther than a light kiss on the lips, and this felt positively exquisite. He could feel Conrad's fingers antsing their way up his arm, slowly tugging the other collar of his shirt down, while his mouth was preoccupied with his earlobe. "Mmg…"

The knight was _very_ pleased. It was official--Yuuri was positively delectable. His neck tasted of strawberries and a certain type of unexplainable spice that was intensely alluring, whilst his hair was undescribable--no scent could even rival him.

"What do you wish of me, Yuuri?" Yes, the animal in him craved for this boy. "What do you wish for me to do? I am your servant."

Yuuri pouted. "Conrad, hold on." He pushed himself up from the bed, yet still laying down. He looked at Conrad with a steady stare. "No more of this 'master and servant' thing, okay? It just…it doesn't make this feel like it's being done out of emotion."

With that, Conrad's senses came back, because, who else but him would realize: why?

"Hei--"

Yuuri shushed him with a delicate kiss. "Yuuri, Conrad. And I just…" he nibbled at his lip, blushing lightly—now of all times, "I want to make sure that this isn't just to teach me about uh…you know…the…stuff."

Conrad squashed a chuckle, "Stuff?", and failed miserably.

"Sex! There I said it." Yuuri pouted and turned away, arms crossed. It was quite amusing (and arousing for any man who found young boys attractive as darling Humbert's Dolores had been) to see the maou stoic, with shirt halfway off, barely-visible kiss marks and still glistening lips.

Yes, very _very_ amusing.

"You needn't worry, **Yuuri."** Conrad accentuated for his master's obvious pleasure, who blushed darker in return. "I will take care of you."

And he did, glorifying and relishing each and every sound, kiss, taste of his precious, precious maou.

He would never forget this day.

* * *

Preview for Sequel: (Tell me)

_"You promised, Conrad…you promised you wouldn't…"_

_"I don't know why, how, or even who you are, but when I am near, my heart is filled with a joy as I've never experienced."_

_"I have an assignment for you. Find him, and eliminate him."_

_"Give me a sign you know, Conrad…just tell me."_

Coming…sometime! Whence I have gotten more of my new Death note fic 'Strawberry Gashes' (unreleased right now) finished! 

**_IT HAS PLOT. :O_**


End file.
